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We are living in crazy times. Right?! If at least one of these terms don’t raise a brow or roll an eye: woke, ascension, conspiracy theories, truthers, narcissistic, toxic, spirituality….I don’t know what will. If you watch the news or follow social media the feeling of doom and gloom or that everyone has simply lost their minds is pretty normal. No matter what side you are on, although I implore everyone to keep their eyes wide open, please don’t shatter your relationships.

We have taken such a step back as a society. The judgement, the labels, the virtue signaling, and the division is heartbreaking. When did we lose sight of respect? How can we expect to be raising the next generation to be respectful humans? So much energy is poured into being inclusive and accepting of things that are not the norm. Why? Were we actually that broken before this wave of Inclusivity? I call bulls**t on that. A lack of respect for one another is at the core of our issues. Love thy neighbor. Treat others as you want to be treated. While these are familiar phrases for my generation, they are phrases that are dying as we run further and further from God. We weren’t created to live as we are.

Woke to me doesn’t mean being woke to accepting all of the abnormal parts of society. To me it means questioning everything I trusted to be true and righteous before. I trusted the intent of our leaders, the integrity of our products, the quality of our food, and the medical systems devotion to care and helping the sick. All of that has been completely thrown out the window. My eyes are wide open and I have awoken from my sheepish sleep. Let me tell you, I’d rather go back to sleep. It’s disappointing and frightening how our society has lost its way. Greed has become such a strong force in so many that society has been shaken to it’s core.

Now I am considered a “conspiracy theorist” by some. This used to be something I interpreted with crazy or an alternate reality. Now it’s just words. Those that aren’t ready to leave the safety of their sleepy reality can considered me a conspiracy theorist and it doesn’t shake me. Part of me is sad they may experience harm because they are not cautious about some of the things I am. However I must respect boundries, respect that we don’t need to change each other’s minds or prove who is right or wrong. It’s not necessary. I will be here if they dip their toes in the sand of questioning things. I will still love and support them if their world comes crashing down, because of things they refused to a knowledge. I will also still be here with love in my heart if they never wake up. You will not find me being one to say “I told you so.”

How boring would our world be if we all shared the same beliefs and ideals. I remain interested (fascinated at times), and open to hearing other people’s experiences. Seeing the world through someone else’s eyes is the beauty of opening up and meeting new people. As long as we don’t insult each other’s differences and are respectful; Why can’t we crush these divisive barriers? We experience this life to love; to give and recieve love. Sadly I am quite certain that some assume I am judgmental, paranoid, or an anxious overthinker. I mean maybe or maybe this is what happens when your eyes are wide open to the reality that not everyone’s heart is pure.

Don’t mistake my openness with acceptance though. My moral compass is still good and well. I still look to God to help me maintain that compass. I still use my critical thinking and decipher what my intuition guides me to know as true. I still pray and fight to put faith into God having this all in his hands. I still believe that as frightening as things get; having hope and faith in the goodness of God’s love will prevail. Some won’t understand my spiritual soul. Some will define things in a different manner. Some will feel this shift is ascension that brings us closer to our creator and his plan. I will continue to shift in my spiritual growth. My pursuit of a relationship with Jesus will go through ebs and flows but I will never not know him to be the love that flows through each of us. For that reason I will chose to respect others with differing opinions, provided they don’t cause harm to others.

Protect the innocent. Appreciate those with a pure heart and loving intentions. Love thy neighbor. Treat others as you want to be treated. Fight for salvation of our society. Above all, pray. Pray if you don’t believe there is a God listening and pray if you do. Hope is all that is anchoring us into the good we used to know. It can be recreated. The division, the lost souls, the darkness that has crept in: it can be crushed. Don’t close your eyes, keep them wide open and focus on what you want to see in the next generation’s future. I do not want to reminisce about the days we were free with my children. Keep fighting to end up on the right side of history.

In my opinion the term Empathic is thrown around so much. We all have the ability to express empathy and sympathy for others. God designed us to support each other and the phrase “Love thy neighbor” also takes shape in our ability to give sympathy and empathy to others.

I want to take a minute to break down each expression in the simplest way possible.  Sympathy is expressing consideration for what someone is experiencing or feeling. It’s an acknowledgement that they are seen, heard and cared for. Empathy is acknowledging all of the same things but from a place of experience. Being able to relate on a deeper level because you have experienced some of the same struggles in your own journey. Being Empathic is not just feeling empathy.  Being Empathic is feeling what others feel; being a sponge to other’s energy. For example if I am around someone who is irritable, I become irritable just in their presence. Not necessarily because they are responding to things with irritability, but their energy can mesh with mine and I experience things through their lens so to speak. 

Being Empathic can be consuming and overwhelming if we do not recognize that we have the ability to connect with someone else’s energy on a deeper level, making it feel like our own experience.  We have to be really careful and acknowledge that feeling deep sadness for someone who has experienced trauma, tragedy and loss is an attribute. From an Empathic perspective though it can be difficult to untangle someone else’s response to things from our own. It can make public places and connections with others exhausting and overwhelming. Many Empaths have social anxieties or wear down after being at large social gatherings or busy places.

Empaths tend to carry around emotional clutter. For example, we may learn of a fellow parent losing a child and it really impacts us. We hold onto the sadness and pain we felt putting ourselves in their shoes. We carry it around with us feeling so deeply sorry for another’s experience.  It’s both beautiful and challenging. Most feel an emotional response to tragedy, it’s part of the human design. It helps connect us as one. It’s a positive attribute that God designed us to have. However, for some empaths who are not self aware it can feel debilitating and like you do not have control over feeling emotionally centered or balanced. It’s very important for Empaths to be self aware. It’s necessary for us to own what we feel and experience and separate our own responses from another’s. It can get sticky because if you are around someone who is angry but not expressing that anger, you may feel angered easily and not understand it’s an Empathic response. This is why it’s necessary for us to sit with our own internal feelings and be aware of our moods and needs.  I have some suggestions for clearing emotional clutter and centering your own emotions over what you have absorbed from other’s experiences.  Some may seem silly and unnecessary to even mention but staying focused on yourself is challenging for Empaths.

EPSOM SALT BATHS can help ground you and clear energy. If you don’t have time for a bath or maybe your home simply doesn’t have a tub, try a foot soak. A fantastic foot soak for detoxing as a bonus: 1/2 Cup Baking soda, 1/2 Cup Peroxide, 1/2 Cup Epsom Salts, 10-12 drops of Theraputic Grade Rosemary oil. Epsom salts are something you will want on hand as an Empath. *Essential oil tip bonus: add unscented Epsom Salts to a Mason jar, bury an empty essential oil bottle of your choice in the jar. The salts will absorb the scent.

JOURNALING your feelings at the start of the day or in the evening helps purge and acknowledge some of the clutter. What works for me is writing letters to my kids in a journal although committing to it daily is not my strength. It does allow me to acknowledge the experiences, beauty, and challenges of the day to day. It’s healthy for my soul and my children will appreciate my words someday when they can’t hear them from my mouth.

READING THE BIBLE Or DEVOTIONALS. Some may prefer to read affirmations if they do not feel aligned to the Bible’s teachings and that is fine. Taking time to connect with the divine and our purpose is a powerful way to start your day. 15 minutes to sit with the messages a day will transform your day. It’s a fantastic way to live through the word throughout the week. If you go to church and the message makes you feel charged with purpose and speaks to your heart but you don’t take it home, church service can feel like you are just topping off until the next service. If you take the time to connect daily or even 5 out of 7 days you will see how you invite God into your life that extends beyond the community of church.

CRYSTALS AND STONES also provide a frequency that some feel very drawn and connected to.  My favorite shop for wearable stones and crystals is on Etsy, https://www.etsy.com/shop/Bluesky1111handmade.  She doesn’t sponsor this blog or anything of that nature I just truly love the care and attention to details the owner freely gives to her products.  Good stones for empaths and really all energetically sensitive individuals: Hematite, Labradorite, Black Tourmaline, Rose Quartz, and Selenite. I like to use selenite anywhere I store my stones to help purify them after I have worn or used them. Explore the site above and you will likely find a combination of the stones mentioned above in one of her beautifully made products.

PRAYER is also something that empaths can lean into to help protect and clear their energy. I personally call on ArchAngel Michael regularly for protection from energy that is not my own. If you are new to prayer or it’s not part of your daily dialogue; make it your own. There is no right or wrong way to pray. The divine and the Arch Angels can give you faith that you have unseen warriors of God on your side at all times. Empaths especially need to release heavy emotional clutter and acknowledge that God has things handled.  Nothing is placed on your path that isn’t meant to give you the tools to help another. If it seems heavy in the present, know that it will be something that will lighten the emotional load for another in the future. You are designed to do wonderful things.

DEEP BREATHS to clear your mind sounds like a no-brainer right? It’s actually something that most of us have a hard time remembering to do and it’s free and easy to do. Take 3 deep breaths through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth. That little extra oxygen to your brain can help bring things back into perspective. I still hear my college professor’s words in my mind when I do this reminding me it’s a simple thing to do in intense situations.

If you are feeling out of control of your emotions due to Empathic abilities take your power back by being aware of your emotional state before you surround yourself by others. Connecting deeply to other’s emotions once you harness your abilities can position you to understand the unspoken needs of others. It can give you the tools to support others and connect when they feel burdened by heavy emotions. It’s a beautiful tool and can enrich your soul and connections. Embrace the beauty within.

I am in a lot of groups on social media. Sometimes just to be a fly on the wall for information. Sometimes to feel like my messy life is sort of normal. I also love to boost people up. I don’t know why, but it’s been something I have done since I was in management. I saw how it helped people grow and feel valued and it lit a spark inside me. I don’t do the fake unrealistic boosts. That’s not my personality. I try very hard to stay true to being authentic and genuine and if I can’t I normally opt to stay quiet. In the same sense I can also be a real pain in the ass to argue with. If I say something mean or nasty I meant to say it and I don’t often apologize for what I have said. I will apologize for how I have made someone feel because it’s not my intent to cause hurt. I digress….

I have noticed so many spend time dwelling on the trolls and unpleasant people or the easily offended. Keyboard warriors or trolls as we call them. So many “clap backs” to have the last word. My internal dialog may be coming up with vicious clap backs, but that’s when I need to unplug the most and remind myself what my values are. A “What Would Jesus Do” moment if you will. Our ego is always internally battling our every obstacle, our every challenge, and choice. It’s so noisy at times; the negative voice inside our head and the little devil on our shoulder. We have to remember who we want to be or become and how it ripples out to the world. It’s very challenging to live in this social media, self obsessed, and instant gratification world.

What I do notice is the kindness extended. I notice the women who take a moment out of their day to read someone’s vent post or plea for advice. I notice women encouraging other women saying: “you got this”. I notice other women sharing their stories and making connections and feeling and giving support. I notice women pushing each other to success. I notice women accepting different shapes and sizes in their own beauty. I notice people supporting each other’s healthy choices. I notice people taking a moment in their mindless scroll to reassure a complete stranger that all will work out and to stay strong. This is what we don’t dwell on…we don’t highlight this enough. Our human connection. The power of being kind to someone who is struggling to put one foot in front of the other. The power of telling someone who is grieving a loved one that their emotions are okay. The power of telling someone who is struggling to commit to healthy choices that they CAN do it. The power of telling someone else they don’t have to be like the “perfect parent” they perceive, because it doesn’t exist.

It’s really no joke to say you could truly save a life extending loving, supportive words. Most of us have heard the story about the suicidal teen who was helped and befriended by someone in school who was completely unaware of their pain. How it changed the trajectory of that boy’s life and how he chose to live. I have had this experience. I have supported someone who was truly on the verge of sinking into depression and giving up. It’s so powerful to see someone reestablish their hope and their worth. Can you imagine being that for someone; someone you have never met or barely know? God puts us in those places and aligns our opportunity to show someone their work here isn’t done. To remind someone that their absence would break someone’s heart and change their life forever. Our words and support are so valuable.

If I can leave this imprint on your heart; try not to forget we all come to our present place based on our own individual experiences. No two of us are the same although we find support in similarities. We are all woven differently. We all have very different blocks on our life’s quilt and they are perfection. We are all designed by God in our different shapes, sizes, traumas, brokenness, appearances, and so many other divine peices of us. Sometimes I am in awe of the intricate beauty in the world.

In those moments something triggers you, triggers your ego or your trauma take a moment. Will the things you have to say serve a purpose? Does it help you or someone else? Those of you taking a moment to support someone else: I see you. I am in awe of you. I know that because of you a little of hope in humanity rippled out today and that is powerful.

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Have you ever noticed in today’s dating world nice guys finish last? Ever wondered why that is? There has been this long time excuse that some girls just want bad boys. Maybe they like the challenge but do we really want the “bad boy?”

We see it all the time, maybe in personal experience or from the outside looking in on a friend’s wild dating stories. The bad boy gets our blood boiling. Until we let ourselves believe that we could be the one to change this wild soul and settle him down. Ultimately in most scenarios leaving us heartbroken and full of self doubt when that is not how it plays out. We insist either that we are done with dating or we pledge to never pursue another bad boy. So in some sick logic what we really do want is the bad boy to become the nice guy; the nice guy that we just weren’t attracted to because we weren’t prepared for all that. We want a partner that is the best friend we do life with, but we are so quick to put the nice guys who offer true friendship in the “friend zone.”  You know the one, the “zone” of guys you would call to pour your heart out to, but would never sleep with. Are some women just broken in love? Maybe, maybe some are, but I have a thought.

Maybe we have conditioned ourselves to expect less. Maybe romance and real intimacy have been squashed with the times. In this instant gratification world where we basically shop online for a mate, sizing them up (sometimes literally), and checking their qualifications like a resume. Sexual intimacy has lost it’s value. Men are sending pictures of their genitals like it’s what’s on the menu. There isn’t much mystery other than what they smell like. The saddest part is we have been conditioned to think this is normal and okay. A man sends you an unsolicited picture of their penis and instead of feeling like you have just come in contact with a predator; you are sizing up whether his parts are sufficient. Sadly, this is starting from a young age. Little girls, barely going through puberty are fully familiar with the term “dick pic” and it’s frightening. That’s a topic for another day. What’s concerning is this is becoming normal. The bad boy has taken the front seat and the nice guy is left behind entirely.

My thoughts, the nice guy is so under valued. Having dated some I would have dumped in the “nice guy” category, I now realize their love language just wasn’t my own. Maybe they were just raised right and taught to win a woman’s heart and I didn’t see it. For what it’s worth-nice guys you deserve better. Save the flowers and all of the romance. Not because you shouldn’t honor your good upbringing and kind heart but because women aren’t conditioned to appreciate it anymore. Instead all you have to do is show up.

Hear my advise out. Just show up. Get to know her before you shower her with romance. Be there when she shows you how she handles stress, fear, sadness, joy, anger, adventure, and faith. If you can accept her for all she is and still see her beauty then shower her with romance. Women have to value nice guys again or marriage will become a dying breed. Nice guys, never stop being the nice guy. Open those doors, buy those flowers, and tell her she is beautiful. Just wait until you really see her so she recognizes the value of your gestures and never stop taking those small steps to win her. Love has to have a foundation. A friendship foundation. Nice guys, I hope you don’t become the dying breed because the bad boys are pitching a homerun for you right now. Don’t miss the opportunity.

I am sure this will rattle a few feathers, but that’s okay. Friends support each other’s marriages! Marriage is hard. It is work. It is being intentional about showing your love even when you don’t like the other person. Let’s face it, you won’t like the other person often. It’s doing things that make you uncomfortable because they aren’t in your nature. It’s getting through the really hard seasons TOGETHER.

True friends support your marriage. They are compassionate and empathetic when you are hurt and struggling, but they don’t forget there are two people involved in your relationship. True friends remind you that your struggle is a season you can get through. True friends help you see that it often takes two to break and two to repair a marriage.

Don’t get me wrong there are always special circumstances that can’t be reconciled. On the broader spectrum, most things can be. If you are that friend that someone put enough faith and trust in to discuss their marital struggles; please don’t fail your friend by bashing their spouse. I can tell you I have been that crumby friend who was appalled and mad at the way someone treated my friend and have put my foot in my mouth. I thought I was being supportive at the time. In time you see through your own marital strife that it’s quite contrary to support. It does the opposite of your intention. It more than likely isolates your friend more next time they are going head first into another marital challenge.

Friends, if your spouse is pushing you to the limit and your marriage is struggling seek support from those who want your marriage to succeed. I am not saying seek support from someone who supports your spouse’s bad behavior; no not all. I am saying it is unrealistic to think your marriage is always going to be happy and that your spouse should never hurt your feelings. It’s going to happen. Just the same as it does in our friendships. At some point feelings get hurt. How you recover from that will strengthen your relationship. I can guarantee there are people by your side in this journey who want your marriage to succeed. Find those people; hold them dear.

Friends, I support your marriage. I want your marriage to succeed. I will do my best to listen to your struggle and to pray you get past it. I want you to find the ultimate happiness with your partner in crime.

You know those crazy things in life that seem to just keeping happening to you? Those frustrating patterns that make it seem as though the only luck you have is bad luck? I mean at some point in life we are all there for a season. Maybe a painfully long season or maybe it’s brief. By now most are familiar with the phrase: “it comes in threes.” That phrase sucks. Have you ever taken the opportunity to dig a little deeper and reflect on why these things keep happening in your life? The frustrating barriers, challenges, and disappointments that seem to plague your existence and you can’t make sense of it. I have challenged two thought processes on this myself.

The most obvious idea is that you are not seeing the lesson in these experiences. You have to repeat them over and over again until you break the pattern because one or two seasons of unfortunate events just wasn’t enough for the lesson to resonate. I think once we get over ourselves and see past the idea that these things are happening to us and not for us; there is progress made. Our creator didn’t bring us here to not grow on the journey. Sit down with any person older than you and let them tell you the wisdom they have gained from decade to decade. That is what we are designed to do.

The second idea is that evil does it’s best to trample good. If you are doing good and on the right path I can assure you evil is chomping at the bits to derail you. In that darkness is where we find the light. We either gravitate towards it, cling to hope or we stay in darkness. Who doesn’t want to keep pushing for light in their life? We can choose to have faith that good will conquer evil. We can choose to stay in the light and approach the challenges with a loving, faithful heart. We can choose good and to be good, kind, and determined. Each time we follow the news and social media its easy to get swept away with the idea that the world is in turmoil. If you look around you and inside yourself the scale tilts towards good every time. Sorry evil, you are fighting a losing battle.

I have stories. Crazy stories and patterns that I knew had a purpose. Crazy experiences that I knew were happening for me but why? I have shared those crazy stories and experiences because they are entertaining. Also, because someone will translate them into a message for their life. We are all connected and no person who you have met was by accident. After so many years of telling myself if it wasn’t for bad luck I’d have none at all, one person believed in me and it’s as though she whispered in God’s ear upon her passing. My entire life shifted in the most beautiful way. I am grateful. I am blessed and damn, I miss her.

This amazing thing happens throughout your life: you find your tribe. I remember as far back as Elementary school having a group of friends that helped me grow and face challenges. That continues through school milestones, relationships, adulting, parenting, and personal growth. You find people along the way facing the same challenges and sharing the same joy and those people become your tribe. As youth we strive to belong; to fit in. Then this amazing thing happens somewhere between and into adulting. You stop trying to fit in and you realize the beauty inside you that you have to offer.

Once upon a time my tribe represented all of the outwardly strong people I was drawn to. Strong, opinionated powerhouses that live fiercely and in their truth. It’s difficult to find other people with strong personalities that you don’t butt heads with, but when you do your tribe is a force to be reckoned with.

Then the strangest thing happened. Along the way I started to recognize those who were inwardly strong. Those who have opinions but are more tactful then I about sharing them. Those who have nothing to prove because they are certain of themselves and what they bring to the table. Those who live fiercely in their truth, because they trust the plan God has designed for them. These people I have come to admire. They seem to have a greater peace within them. An academic approach to life as if each day and experience is a lesson in their journey. The flaws and the attributes all embraced within them.

It pains me to say this. To give my mom this credit, and recognize a peice of her wisdom was true. My sister and I still roll our eyes when these moments arise. My mom was right about the company you keep. All her preaching when I was younger about how “you are the company you keep” was dead on. My sister and I recently went to see a motivational speaker and she too said something to this effect. We rolled our eyes.

Now in this adulting-parenting-life building stage of life this amazing aspect has blossomed. When I do meet someone that doesn’t push me to be the best version of me, doesn’t live as I would like to live, doesn’t support me at my best and worst; I accept that they are not my tribe. It’s so liberating. It’s okay. It’s absolutely okay to say something or someone isn’t for me and it’s amazing to be here.

I still think it’s very valuable, for each of our personal growth, to have friends that do not see things the way we do, people who are further along in their life, people who are where you want to be, and everything in between. However, choose your closest 5 wisely. While you do, question if you are in someone’s top 5. I hope your tribe inspires you to be the best version of yourself. I hope you are in someone’s top 5.

Picture this, it’s an ordinary day, a no school day because my son only goes to school 3 days a week right now. I have cramps. I have bathed my tummy in Essential Oils to prevent the Dragon from bursting out of it’s cave with teeth barred. My son is screaming and throwing toys, because he left a treasured toy at his grandparent’s and we must hop in the car and go get it at once. My almost two year old has sneezed and has a trail of disgustingness almost in her mouth and goes to swipe it away with her hand as I am picking her up to change her stinky diaper. This is only 5 minutes of my day. It’s not even 9 am. Did I mention this is pre-coffee?





This won’t define my day, but let me just remind us all motherhood is not always full of the Instagram and Facebook pictures of Joy and Love. Oh no, these littles try your patience and strength and gag reflex often. Let this be a reminder raising littles is a job. It’s one of the most important jobs truly. The loving kisses we plant on our kids after the boogies and butts are wiped. The time out to pull our patience together that we take when our child is being a complete monster over something they will be over in 5 minutes. Those moments define the day. Hold on to those mamas.





My husband understands this job is draining. He knows he goes to work and even the grumpiest of patients is still a breaking from the chaos crew madness at home. He is in the thick of it the moment he walks through the door. He helps fill those little bellies, bathe those stinky buns, break up the sibling rivalries and fights to hold a conversation with me. I am blessed. In the moments of insanity I often find myself mumbling “we need date night”.





To anyone who pictures stay at home moms at home lovingly preparing snacks, playing with their kids and shopping I am here to remind you those lovely things sometimes happen, but kids are work. There is no denying that working moms have a delicate balancing act with work-life balance. That job is hard too. Single moms, God bless you because this is a hard job and you are amazing. Moms keep doing that job with all that you have, because the world will appreciate the amazing little people you are fighting to raise.

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The Holidays truly are one of my favorite times of year. From October through New Year’s so many memories are made and traditions are solidified. Mom truth though: I am so glad it’s all over! From the Halloween Costumes to the New Years celebration, the planning is extensive. I find myself wiped out and very ready for the kids to return to school and routine. The mornings of sleeping in and snuggles have been wonderful. Stinky kid breath and a kick to my face in their sleep and all. However, now that they are back to school it’s perfectly timed, because this mom needs her “me time”.

We all have our different ways of settling into “me time”. Mine has never been the pampering with a pedicure or a massage. Those things are lovely at times because my body needs it, but my real “me time” is the time I am able to feed my soul. I have heard some moms who enjoy a challenging run (never going to happen here), putting the kids to bed early enough for some time to themselves, shopping, reading, bible study…whatever you can do to collect yourself back to YOU. This year I need to begin allowing routine time for myself. A morning routine is something successful people swear by so why not? So in the chaos of momming my three little monsters I am trying to devise a morning plan that feeds my soul because “me time” isn’t just for your days off.

As moms we tend to pour everything into our kid’s happiness. This is an absolute virtue, but it’s so easy to neglect our own needs. Those things we once did that made us feel alive sometimes change after kids. It’s okay if those things don’t fit anymore. It’s okay if those things that spark your soul are different. We aren’t made to stay the same. This life is a journey. If you aren’t trying to grow personally and aren’t forcing yourself to be a little uncomfortable sometimes you miss out on accomplishments you will be so proud to call your own. So, Moms even if you think New Years resolutions are nonsense I challenge you to make some “me time” in 2019. What sparks your soul? What motivates you to start your day? What makes you feel alive?

Happy New Years!

I can remember the moment things changed like it was yesterday.  We had just lost my cousin.  She was a friend and someone I will always miss greatly.  Even in her illness and heartbreak her words of encouragement were profound.  When she passed I remember telling my husband I wanted to go to church that weekend.  It felt like it was time to weave it into our lives.  Whether it was because my soul, our marriage, our children needed it, or that my cousin would have wanted it doesn’t make a difference now.  That decision changed everything.  

There was something about this specific change to our lives that changed the way we lived.  All of the good was highlighted and all of the struggles had to be faced.  We pulled away from people and things that didn’t fill our cup.  If that pertains to anyone reading this trust me, you too will benefit from our drawbacks.  Life isn’t perfect now, but the things that fill my heart with peace and joy are.  

My little chaos crew loves church.  My oldest has become so intrigued and warmed by the lessons she learns.  My middle and only son doesn’t put up a fight when we drop him off for class and that is good enough for me (for now).  My youngest has adopted a loving following at our church.  It’s hard to dismiss the idea that her purpose is to spread joy.  My husband and I have a new dialogue.  It doesn’t include anger, resentment, and irritation.  It is a new direction and a new growth for us individually and as a couple.  The growth we are making right now will impact our children and their families in the future.  How amazing is that?!  How amazing is it that one decision could change generations?   

It would be a lie if I said this has all been one beautiful experience.  I have had to identify things that have held me back and that part has been very against my nature.  Loyalty is something I have held so high all of my life.  I have had to look at loyalty a different way.  I have been forced to recognize that the best me is the one that takes care of myself and identifies the things that fill my cup.  

If you have stuck with me this far in you may have caught on that this very thing you are reading is part of me honoring what fills my cup.  That simple handwritten journal I had started for my kids just may have been a segway for something.